April 2000
Ranked Pranks
Top Ten expat April Fool's capers
10. Tell your boss you are being deported (cruel).
9. Tell your family and friends you are moving home (particularly cruel).
8. Tell your German friends that, on April 1, your native land celebrates
Christmas and that you expect to receive gifts.
7. Tell your girlfriend or boyfriend that your resident’s permit will not
be renewed unless he or she marries you within 30 days.
6. Tell your expat friends that a new rule has been added to the German Rechtschreibung reform — verbs will no longer end in “en,” but, rather, “op” (“Entschuldigop Sie, könnop Sie mir Ihre Uhr Zeigop?”).
5. Tell newcomers it is their duty to make a citizen’s arrest if they spot someone drinking beer on the U-Bahn.
4. Tell a newcomer that, when going to the Poccistrasse to apply for a residence permit, it is customary to “high-five” the administrator in charge of his or her case upon entering the office.
3. Decorate your front door with pumpkins and witches and give your confused mailman a mini-Snickers bar.
2. Send photos of you, standing in the Nymphenburg garden, home to the folks and ask them how they like what you’ve done with your yard.
1. Enjoy a day of catching up with old friends. Call everyone you know — collect!
